In the magazine they have a section called Your Words. Every month they ask readers to post their answers to questions via Facebook, Twitter or some other way. This month people responded to the following question - What are you unapologetic about? I totally agreed with one of the responses. "I'm unapologetic about my laugh. I never try to hide it, no matter which form it takes: giggle, guffaw. wheeze, or the silent body-shaking tears-streaming-down-my-face laugh."
This is me. For most of my life I have been told many times that I was too loud, laughed too much, talked too much. Whatever it was. It was to me devastating comments. Basically people were telling me not to be me. I never understood why someone would hurt another person like they hurt me. What was ever so bad about people having fun and laughing? Were other people so offended by happiness that we needed to turn to another adult, and go SHHHHHHH. I rebelled against it. It made me want to be louder and louder. That was not the way to go either.
What I learned was that if I was true to myself then I would be able to stand up to my critics. I was able to say to them that they did not have the right or authority to do that to me as a person. When I cowered or got louder I gave them permission to be judgmental jerks to me. I no longer let anyone belittle and demean me. I have become strong enough and adult enough to say no.
I want when a loud, little girl comes in to the room to be celebrated for her enthusiasm, her humor, her joy. Not to be repressed because she should be lady like. If behavior needs to changed rather then shaming someone, what about explaining and talking to them? Much better approach. I spent years with a low self esteem because of those comments. No more. I used to be shhhhed, not anymore.